Posts: 8299 |
Scottish Dubliner Posted Fri 29 Feb, 2008 11:19 AM |
MALE VS. FEMALE AT THE ATM MACHINE
A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads
"Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.
Customers using this new facility are
requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.
After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have been developed. Please follow the Appropriate steps for your gender."
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MALE PROCEDURE
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.
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FEMALE PROCEDURE
Unfortunately, most of this part is the Truth.!!!!
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided!
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.
Dubz
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Posts: 2782 |
Hanne Posted Fri 29 Feb, 2008 11:40 AM |
LOL
Safe to say that I'm not one of these women. Reason: I don't own a driving licence :oP |
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Posts: 1918 |
Moray Posted Fri 29 Feb, 2008 11:45 AM |
| I can't believe I was labelled the sexist one! |
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Somewhere Else Posted Fri 29 Feb, 2008 11:56 AM |
| LOL I think there are 'some' elements of truth in that although I am only talking of myself.... Men do seeem to be able to gauge a car better ( in general) . Fact. |
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Posts: 3258 |
mili Posted Fri 29 Feb, 2008 12:06 PM |
Hanne wrote: LOL
Safe to say that I'm not one of these women. Reason: I don't own a driving licence :oP
I have a driving licence, but I've never owned a car. In the long gone days I used my dad's car I was sometimes "complimented" of driving like a man, so I don't think that would apply to me either :^P (there's a little Marcus Grönholm/Kimi Räikkönen inside every Finn...)
Nowadays I use bicycle and public transport. |
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Posts: 8299 |
Scottish Dubliner Posted Fri 29 Feb, 2008 12:19 PM |
MoraySwan wrote: I can't believe I was labelled the sexist one!
Oh I admit to be totally sexist, there are differences between men and women, physically.
I will stop being sexist when women get and respect equal rights. I am fed up with women who want to be their own woman but still expect me to offer a seat or hold a door open for them. Ye Cannae Huv it Baith Whayes!!! So make up yer feckin' mind do you want chivalry and protection or do you want independence.
Dubz
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paul_c Posted Fri 29 Feb, 2008 1:48 PM |
| Haha, that's brilliant!! |
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missmoo Posted Fri 29 Feb, 2008 2:04 PM |
| Had a good giggle at them! |
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Rhoobarb Posted Fri 29 Feb, 2008 2:08 PM |
| Hahahah I like it. |
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deebee Posted Fri 29 Feb, 2008 4:41 PM |
| haha, oooh that was a little too close for comfort! yes, I've been known to do a few of those things. (I'm sure I'm not the only one!) |
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AbsolutPurple Posted Fri 29 Feb, 2008 4:45 PM |
| funny ! |
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emmahealy Posted Mon 03 Mar, 2008 3:28 AM |
hey!!!!!
23 should read..
give the finger to irrate male driver with HUGE dented bumper.
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Posts: 8299 |
Scottish Dubliner Posted Wed 12 Mar, 2008 9:57 AM |
Dubz
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Ursina Posted Wed 12 Mar, 2008 10:58 AM |
| no comment... never used one of thems :-P |
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Peewee Posted Wed 12 Mar, 2008 2:22 PM |
That's so wouldn't be me!
Plus if where does it mention woman reverses INTO cash machine, now that would be funny!!! :) then it might be more like me! JOKE!!! :p |
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