Got in from Sweden last night at a ridiculous
hour and slept until awoken by the alarm wasp.
The alarm wasp comes in through our bedroom window at 7.45 am on most mornings. I hate the alarm wasp. I don't kill insects as a rule. The only insects I kill are midgies, Scotlands answer to the mosquito. Midgies are killable. Wasps and other insects I direct to the nearest open window and off they go.
So today we have to have a full medical which is required for certain parts of the filming of 'Why Does It Always Rain On Me?' (WDIAROM?) video for insurance purposes.
The medical is quite demanding.The doctor tests my vision and hearing then hands me a plastic cup and asks me to give him a urine sample which I cannot so he fills the cup up with fizzy water and tells me to drink. I drink.
The doctor is a middle aged man and very amiable. Then its down to the Y-fronts for reflexes, balance and co-ordination, blood pressure and heart rate.
To do the heart rate he attatched me via little electrodes to an ECG machine which gives him a readout of what my heart does when relaxed. Then he leads me to a carpeted box and I do step up, step down exercises until knackered. Then he checks the heart rate of a knackered man and records the results.
By then I needed a piss so he gets his sample. The last thing was a respiratory check. I had to blow into a tube that was connected to a computer. Graphs show lung capacity. Oh and a blood sample. I must've blocked this out of
my memory. I don't like needles. It was painless though. I am fit for our next encounter with
John Hardwick.
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